Thursday, April 26, 2012

I was a teenage film snob

You know those pretentious people who think foreign language films are better than English language films just because they require subtitles? Those dumbasses who make snide comments every time they're forced into watching a brainless summer blockbuster?

Well, a few years ago, that was me. I was a teenage film snob.

I'm not even sure what brought on my ridiculous haughtiness, but I'm gonna go ahead and blame the "gateway" movies that started this craze. Here's looking at you, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind and Ghost World.

Somehow I started getting into Bergman, Godard, Rivette, and the wonderful Eric Rohmer (who is actually awesome and not really pretentious). Don't even get me started on Fellini.

Now that I'm older and a little wiser, I think I've found a nice balance in my movie viewing habits. While I can still appreciate some classic, independent, or foreign films, I also have a crazy love for Adam Sandler, Zooey Deschanel, and the Hunger Games.

But to celebrate (and laugh at) my past holier-than-thou attitude, I present: the best and worst movies I forced myself to watch.

We'll start with the hall of shame.

Cherie's Hall of Shame: Pretentious Movies That Sucked and/or Confused Me

8 1/2
Director: Federico Fellini
Year: 1963

The film's premise is intriguing. It's basically about a director who is kind of directing a movie about his own life. And crazy stuff happens. Like this fat lady from his past is on a beach or something. I'm not actually sure. I only watched it because it was supposedly artsy and very, very fartsy.

La belle noiseuse
Director: Jacques Rivette
Year: 1991

This movie was fucking four hours long. Four. Fucking. Hours. And what was it about? A painter dude painting this chick. Yep. That's it. According to IMDb's infinite wisdom, "it is a struggle for truth, life and sense, and the question where the limits of arts are or whether art is limitless." Whatever. I feel like a complete moron for having spent good nap time on this.

Pierrot Le Fou
Director: Jean-Luc Godard
Year: 1965

I really have no idea what went on in this, except for that I really dug Anna Karina's oufits. Literally just sat there pretending to be a hipster. No idea. Nothing.

Director: David Lynch
Year: 1977

David Lynch, I'm sorry. I love Blue Velvet. I love Mulholland Drive. I even liked Wild At Heart.

This shit.. no. It was like.. this weird guy and there's this messed up baby. Dude. I can't even do it justice. Here.. watch this if you're not easily creeped out:

So, needless to say, I used to spend a lot of time watching movies I either a) didn't fully understand or b) actually hated and pretended I liked because it was the general consensus of the film snob community that said film was a brilliant piece of artistry.

Thankfully, I gained the confidence in myself and in my own personal taste to scrap that persona. I did, however, find some really lovely movies in this period of my life. My next post will be dedicated to the artsy fartsy movies that I actually really love.. and my defense for loving them.

Until then, make fun of me.

Sunday, April 22, 2012

I lied, but here it is. Giveaway #1.

Remember last week when I said I'd post a giveaway last Tuesday? Yeah. I'm a dirty, rotten liar. And I apologize.

However, I now bring you Pink-Nightmare.Com's first ever giveaway extravaganza.

And what exactly am I offering you lovely people?

A $20 gift certificate to

For those of you who don't know, offer a vast, vast selection of apparel, accessories, and shoes for both ladies and men. Brands include Vans, Macbeth, Billabong, Hurley, DC, etc. Typically, it's more of a skate/surf/punk kind of place... but I'm confident that anyone can find something they like here. And with $20, you're only given the restriction of cost.

Here are a few of the lovely items one can purchase here:

And so many more.

This giveaway will run through May 1st. The winner will be chosen at random on May 2nd.

Here's how it works.

  • You do not have to be following me to win. However, it helps.
  • The prize will be sent via email in the form of a digital gift certificate.
  • The prize is given as stated. No exchanges. Don't be picky, people.
How to enter:
  • Comment on this post, saying what you would get from the store (1 entry -- may be done once)
  • Be a follower (1 entry -- comment saying you are following -- I will verify)
  • Share this link on Facebook (1 entry -- link to your share)
  • Follow me on Twitter (1 entry -- comment saying you are following -- I will verify)
  • Retweet the following on your own personal Twitter: "@cheriejamison at is having her first ever giveaway extravaganza. I entered, and you should too!" (you can RT once a day for 1 entry each)
So.. to recap..

You can win a $20 gift certificate to simply by commenting on what you'd get, following me on here and Twitter, and sharing/re-tweeting.

So.. let the games begin! And good luck! 

Sunday, April 8, 2012

I swear that babies are evil

Happy Easter. I am spending my holiday in the way that I spend every Sunday: waking up earlier than I would prefer, watching the kids in the nursery at church, coming home and debating whether to take a nap or be productive, and going to work.

My nieces, Mara and Madison, who I swear are the only kids I can stand.
I mentioned back in December that I really don't look forward to breeding. I don't like kids. I think most are absolute terrors, and today I just added more evidence to that theory. I'm working on proving it scientifically factual, but for now you will just have to deal with my pessimistic mumblings on why kids and babies are terrible curses (no offense to any parent who loves their kid -- I am told that tends to happen after you produce).

In the nursery, I first was presented with two bundles of joy. The boy, who is probably somewhere between 2 and 3, is always a crier. I'm pretty sure he is just so ridiculously spoiled that he always gets his way no matter where he is. If his family is out of the room for even a fraction of a second, you can guarantee that he is wailing up a perfect storm.

Anyway, he'd only been crying for about five minutes before someone who I assume was his father came and took him back to the main sanctuary, where I'm sure he ran up and down the aisles all through the rest of the service (they allow him to do this, adding to my theory that he is spoiled freaking rotten).

The other kid I had was this precious little girl who I assume is about 1 year old (it's hard for me to tell since I practically avoid children at all costs aside from this weekly torture). She was super cute and quiet, so I thought everything would be fine. Boy was I wrong.

As soon as the spoiled boy left, this girl started wailing as if to make up for the beautiful silence that his absence provided. I offered her a snack. She kept screaming. Her sippy cup? Still crying. A toy? Nothing. I picked her up. I put her down. I sat with her. I stood with her. She screamed and screamed ceaselessly. I checked her diaper -- and of course she was wearing one of those God-awful onesies that are impossible to get off of a screaming child. And of course, her diaper was fine and my efforts were in vain.

It took me most of the service to get her to shut up, and I was only able to do so by standing still and rocking her back and forth until she fell into a very light slumber. It nearly killed my shoulders. As soon as her mom came in, she started bawling again and her mother explained that she was just "a momma's girl." I smiled, told her it was totally fine (even though it very much was not fine). I hate my life.

However, I am counting down the weeks until I can stop doing this terrible thing. And then I can hopefully avoid kids for years and years to come.

PS. Stop back by the blog on Tuesday, as I will be announcing my first ever giveaway. I think it's a pretty good one, so don't miss out on a chance to win something awesome. Until then, please leave me your pretty little thoughts on my mess of a life.

Tuesday, April 3, 2012

Failing at life, and at everything else

I am just so completely done with education.


This semester, I am the laziest I've ever been and, even though my grades are suffering, I just don't care. I just want to pass and get out of there.

I need to find an internship, but that almost seems like a dead end road at this point.

I'm moving back in with my parents in May when my lease expires. The very thought of it makes me want to kill myself, or a small child. Either will do. My stepdad won't let me get another cat because he doesn't want any animals in the house -- despite the fact that I'd be living downstairs and he very rarely even goes down there. Whatever.

I am going to Bamboozle, which will be a ton o' fun. I will get to see blink-182, Foo Fighters, Motion City Soundtrack, All American Rejects, Brand New, Bon Jovi (out of place, I feel), Jimmy Eat World, and some other super awesome bands. I am stoked.

Still dieting. I'm getting kind of used to it, but I'm not really losing very much weight. I let myself eat whatever I want one day of the week, which was yesterday for me. I gorged myself on Mexican food and felt absolutely terrible for the rest of the night. So I guess my body is adjusting to the 1400 calories I allot myself on a given day.

I'm reading the Hunger Games, and I'm really digging it. Count me in on this fad. I'm only 60% done with the first one, but I can't seem to put down my phone (I'm reading it on my phone.. yes, it's odd).

Ok that is all. Good day.



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